Friday, October 19, 2012

CYG - Day 19 - Projects

Today is one of the days I dread all year long.  Today marks 2 years since we found out that our Caroline was gone.  I would be lying if I said I'm not having a rough time.  I had high hopes that this year would feel lighter somehow.  So far, it's not.  I'm feeling the dark coldness of heavy grief again, flashing back to those dark hours, straining to remember the beauty of her face, desperate to touch her again.  It's still impossibly hard.  

I've been blessed to have very sweet friends remember these dark days and send sweet notes, cards, messages.  We're going out of town to my parents' house this weekend.  I'm hoping that being out of our house, our town, away from those milestones, etc will help.  I'm taking a gamble that I won't just want to lay in bed and cover my head all day.  I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I'm not just a complete and total mess for the whole weekend.  Here's hoping!


Back to the Capture Your Grief project:  Day 19 is Projects.  For Caroline's first birthday, I made these blankets and donated them to our hospital.  We took them to L&D on her birthday.  I felt happy with how they turned out and that the families that received them would have them to cherish.  I included the butterfly cards with each one.  Inside there was a note from us and some websites and resources we found helpful.

I'm actually in the process of making several blankets again this year.  I didn't get them done in time for her birthday.  I think I just kept stalling because it was a little too hard for me this time around.  But I'll get them done! 


  1. Thinking and praying for you today friend. I remember reading Caroline's story a long while back. Maybe I'll go back and re-read her story again today to honor her. As long as we all still think, talk, and remember her she'll always be here, even if it's just a living memory.

    Much love to you all!


  2. So sorry it is a hard time for you. I dread those upcoming days that will mark Jonathan's death. I love what Hillary said she will Always be remembered because you are so good at honoring her life. Love the sweet blankets you made, so special.