Held

There’s a song called Held, it’s by Natalie Grant. It’s pretty amazing. It has a really great message.

Two months is too little
They let him go
They had no sudden healing
To think that providence
Would take a child from his mother
While she prays, is appalling

Who told us we'd be rescued
What has changed and
Why should we be saved from nightmares
We're asking why this happens to us
Who have died to live, its unfair

This is what it means to be held
How it feels, when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive
This is what it is to be loved and to know
That the promise was that when everything fell
We'd be held

This hand is bitterness
We want to taste it and
Let the hatred numb our sorrows
The wise hand opens slowly
To lilies of the valley and tomorrow

If hope is born of suffering
If this is only the beginning
Can we not wait, for one hour
Watching for our savior

This is a song that I liked very much before all of this happened to our family. I never knew how much I would be able to identify with the lyrics. I wanted to share this in the hopes that maybe someone else might be able to get something out of it.

After all of this, and through this, we have been held. We have absolutely been held by our Lord and Savior. This is and has been the hardest thing we’ve ever been through. But God has not stopped holding us. I thought that He may have there for a little bit, I felt like He was far away. I felt like He had kind of forgotten about me down here. I felt like He ripped Caroline away from me and then left me to fend for myself. Now though, I can truly see how He held us in His hands during this difficult time. I see ways that He helped us, ways He didn’t leave us alone, ways He used many of you to encourage, to grieve with us, to just be there. I feel the prayers and support coming from everyone. I know that I am not alone. I know that Caroline has touched many lives already, and I hope that we are able to help others with her story.

We’ve still got a long road ahead of us to healing. And I’ll never stop missing my sweet daughter.